eatsyourscience | (no subject)

(no subject)

To begin with, it was Naoto's idea to check up on things in the TV world, and it had become so normal to spend rainy afternoons inside that Souji agreed without requiring much in the way of an explanation, though she provided one anyway. He agreed with all the points she made--that they should keep an eye on the movements of the fog, the density of shadows in various places, if anything had changed since Adachi's defeat--but more than anything, he was beginning to miss that world and the time they spent there.

Chie and Yukiko passed, and so did Kanji when Souji tracked him down at lunch, but Rise was happy to accompany them--a good thing, because Souji didn't think it would be wise to go in without her--and so were Yousuke and Teddie, who agreed with Naoto about the importance of keeping an eye on what was going on in that world. Souji couldn't blame him.

Inside, everything seemed the same. Even the damp smell, the feeling of the fog against his cheeks in odd juxtaposition to the way it vanished in the view through his glasses were the same. He asked Rise to do a scan of the area, but wasn't expecting her excited, staccato announcement that there was a new area she hadn't seen before.

When Kanzeon vanished, Souji glanced around to find everyone looking at him and he almost smiled at how comfortable it had become to see them relying on him. He gave a slight nod and with Rise directing him, led the way past locations they already knew.

They stopped when the ground disappeared in front of them. An expanse of open, empty space spread in front of them, filled with a swirling fog that he could see. Resisting the urge to remove his glasses and clean them, Souji squinted. All that was visible were what looked like several bare, unornamented platforms hovering in the air, each at a greater distance than the last from where they stood.

He looked around, then down, then took a step into open space. Rise called out after him, but trailed off when a walkway materialized beneath his feet, extending for a short distance ahead of him. A few steps across what looked and felt like smooth, gray stone confirmed that it would continue to appear ahead of him as he walked instead of leaving him to step blindly and hope he hadn't come to a corner without noticing. Hefting his sword a little higher, he looked back and nodded to the others that they should proceed.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Yousuke throws Souji's arm over his shoulder, giving him something to lean on... And give himself something to lean on too. They were all exhausted.

"Come on buddy. I've had enough TV world today to last me a lifetime."

Souji nods while Teddie leads the way back back to the main hall. With Yousuke on one side and Rise on the other, he's not worried about losing his footing. He hardly remembers the trek back, though, except that, thankfully, nothing eventful happens until they're back in the electronics department at Junes and getting some odd looks from the few people in the area.

"Come on, into the stock room," Yousuke stage-whispers, leading the rest of them, "There shouldn't be anyone back there this time of day. We'll be cool."

Souji would rather go home and collapse on his futon or the stairs or right in the entryway as long as it was home, where everything and everyone was okay.

But he sucks it up and nods and manages to get to the stock room with the others, where he leans against the wall and considers just lying down and napping.

Everyone just needs a second to sit. Yousuke unceremoniously falls to his rump and pulls a kerchief out of his back pocket to try and clean up where he was visibly bloody, so he wouldn't get as many weird looks on the way back. There was also a back door out so they could leave incognito.

"I could call Dojima-san," Naoto suggests, "As I don't believe that senpai can make the walk back at the moment. To be frank I'd prefer the hospital because of the exposure to the fog, but if that were to spread to the media, it could cause needless panic."

"Totally," Yousuke agrees, considering spitting to make this come out better, "that's the last thing we want. Dojima-san's cool, he understand how this works."

Souji grimaces. His uncle isn't going to let it go so easily, not after what happened to Nanako in the fall. There will probably be yelling.

"I can make it."

"Can you?" Naoto says sternly, meaning I don't think you can.

"Does it really matter how you get there?" Yousuke adds, "Either way, it'll be the same. And dude, you know we're tight, but I'm not lugging your heavy ass halfway across town."

"He'll yell."

"Yeah, Dojima-san yells. That's kind of his thing."

Souji grimaces again, disconcerted by the lack of concern they're exhibiting over just how traumatic Dojima's yelling can be, especially to their brave leader.

...

He laughs quietly and closes his eyes.

"Yeah, okay."

Yousuke gives a thumbs up.

"Good choice!"

Naoto rolls her eyes and begins to dial the number.

"Do you want to talk about this now, or later?"

"Do you?"

He was safe, and while they were all 100% baffled by what just happened, that was much, much more important. It could wait.

"I can."

"Yeah, but if you don't want to, it can wait."

"...We all know how painful it is, senpai."

Souji shakes his head. "It's nothing I didn't already know."

"...If you want to, then."

Everyone sits close to him. Yousuke especially-- he sits close enough that their shoulders are touching. They would accept any explanation he had.

Souji takes a couple of breaths, letting his thoughts trickle into order in the back of his mouth. Their closeness helps to funnel them in the right direction so the words come easily.

"I have a hundred and eighty six Personas. Each of them is a different mask I wear in my life, to get through the day. So sometimes, it's hard to know if there's a real me under it all. If I'm not just all these little shards of glass."

He looks up at Rise and smiles.

"But all of them are me. Altogether, they make me."

Yousuke nods.

"When you told us that you had so many, I had no idea what that was like. In your head, you know? My persona is loud enough alone. I don't know how you do it."

"But they must all be important to you," Naoto continues. Perhaps, as important as they all were to him as well.

"Yeah. And we wouldn't have you any other way."

Souji smiles a little.

"I can hardly remember being any other way."

Yousuke gives Souji's back a hearty pat.

"Yep. You've always been you. I remember."

Souji smiles for a moment more, then looks down.

"But I do remember it. I remember that there's nothing inside me, or there wasn't before."

He's not quite ready to say what comes next.

The others grow quiet to listen, feeling something coming on. Yousuke can't think of something to say that might be refuted, so he gives Souji another gentle, encouraging nudge with his shoulder.

Souji glances at him.

"I don't want it to be like that again when I leave."

"Senpai..."

"Partner, it won't be like that," Yousuke says, somewhat somber. He didn't want Souji to leave either, and he wasn't looking forward to the hole it'll make in his life. But he was confident in this at least, "Even if we're not all here anymore, we'll always be tight. There's no way I could ever forget about you."

"And... There's no way you'd forget about us, right? Then we'll always be with you."

Naoto smiles just a little. She wasn't the best with words of comfort, but she could back up what Yousuke was saying entirely. She nods in approval.